A Husband's Role

 

    I have been reminded over the course of the last couple of days how important my role as a husband is. It is important to me, it is important to God, and it is important to my wife. The job description as a husband is somewhat simple yet complex and difficult to carry out. I'm not here to make excuses for we husbands that fail in this role. We all fall short but need to improve as we move forward in our lives. I been reminded because people near to me are struggling in their marriages and these people have to make difficult decisions concerning their lives. Decisions that effect not only the couples, but the children God has entrusted to them, the extended families around them, their close friends and even casual friends. My heart aches for these people.

    I'm also aware of the fact that I fail in my own marriage and need to remember that part of this job description is to lead. I do fail because I'm not sure of where I'm going part of the time myself and there's pressure when leading someone else in that direction.

Ephesians 5:23 (ESV) For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.

    This verse convicts me partially because of the responsibility involved. There is enough pressure to figure out how to lead myself, let alone another human being. How do I lead or more importantly, where do I lead? One important step in this is to understand what my wife needs from me. In figuring out what she needs I need to listen to her. I can listen and yet not hear. I need to listen intently without distractions. I need to let her finish a thought before interrupting her to tell her I know or to even ask a question when I don't understand her. Maybe if I let her finish her thought I will understand better. And “her thought” is not limited to a certain amount of time. I give her all the time she needs. (as I said earlier- I fail).

Ephesians 5:25-27 (ESV) Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.


    The concept of the roles in marriage is difficult to understand and fulfill what I'm called to do as a husband. You may notice that I skipped over a verse and many of you probably know what this verse is. The reason I skipped it is because there's no action involved on my part. This verse was not directed to me- it's directed to my wife- but I need to know it's there to recognize when my wife is fulfilling her role in our marriage. Nothing more or nothing less. My goal is to be the husband that God's calls me to be- a combination of a leader and a servant.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Value of a Wife

       Have you ever thought about how much your wife is worth to you? The value of a wife is hard to measure. There is so much about a wife that goes beyond any monetary measure, beyond any measure of time. I don't comprehend the value of such a woman to a man as myself. I would not want to think about where I would be without my wife. She does so much for me. We have been married a little over 28 years and knew each other less than 2 years before that. A question comes to mind, how long would I be willing to wait for such a women knowing what I know now? And a second question, how long as a younger man without the wisdom of the years lived?      In the Bible, Genesis chapter 29 there is a story of a man that understands the value of a good wife. Jacob first met Rachel and wanted her to be his wife so much that he volunteered to work for her father for 7 years in order to take her as his wife. He understood this value. One problem that came up was she had an older sister and the c
Read more

Marital Conflict

       Conflict is something that every relationship will experience. How we respond to this difference of opinion can have an effect on our future. We all have natural instincts that govern how we react to certain situations.       For one it might be to avoid, or run away from conflict. Another may be inclined to fight- and fight to win at any expense. Both reactions can lead to further problems. First instead of fleeing, face the conflict. Next instead of fighting to win, use the conflict to come to a resolution- fight for what is right. Talk through the situation to solve the problem. Working toward a resolution will require compromise, forgiveness, and an understanding from the other parties viewpoint.       Going into a conflict situation with our natural tendencies will only cause a wider divide between both sides. My wife and I are alike in some ways we handle conflict and totally different in other ways. We are in agreement not to let problems escalate and let little problems
Read more

Living with the End in Mind

       Every person has a belief of what happens when we quit breathing and leave this world. Some believe that this is all there is. Most believe there is something beyond this life and look at it from three basic views. The first is that there is more and everything (everyone) will be okay. The second is there is more and I'll be okay because I've done enough "good" in my life. The third view is that I'm not okay and I'm in great need of help.      I try to live my life with the end in mind. Through my life I've lived with each of the four views. I've lived my life that everyone would be okay. I've lived as though I had to "do" good to be able to spend eternity as I wanted. I've lived as though this was all there was without regard to anyone else and to get all I could.            After many years of struggling with life and it's purpose, I've discovered that I do truly need help and spent many years trying to find that help
Read more